The Food Bill: 160-2 (2010)

It’s a spanner in the works. The first record of that phrase in print is in P. G. Wodehouse’s ‘Right Ho, Jeeves’ 1934. John Lennon used a play on this phrase in his book ‘A Spaniard in the Works’ and like most Brits in the 1950s he was a fan of ‘Professor’ Stanley Unwin, a comic turn who spoke in a stream of inspired Spooneristic gobbledegook. The Food Bill: 160-2 (2010) is neither inspired nor is it Spooneristic. It’s just gobbledegook.

VPL

VPL is short for Very Penneylane. They’re my take on everyday lessons from life. Lessons learnt and others where I missed the boat completely. Life’s long or short, depending on which end of the paddle you draw. Either way, being stuck up a creek without one makes for some interesting observations.

About that Lesson

Simple isn’t stupid unless you frig with a thing unnecessarily and failing forward is a progressive option. The uproar in the public arena over this Food Bill is that, “it will seriously impede initiatives like community gardens, food co-ops, heritage seed banks, farmers markets, bake sales, and roadside fruit & vegetable stalls”.

Actually, the Bill-thing is much BIGGER than that. Down to the wire, it’s about the more practical consequences that it’ll have on the Food Industry and New Zealand’s critical export market. We’re talking livelihoods (on many levels) being affected here.

In it’s Present Form

The Bill is ill-conceived, inconsistent with reform in other areas of food regulation and submission advice by those who do know like The New Zealand Food & Grocery Council (FCG) has largely been ignored. The Government need to listen, go back to the drawing board, listen some more and re-present a legitimate Bill of coherency and practical application.

The Problems and my Penneysworth

There are four main problems with the Bill as it stands. These are:

(a) A further tier of regulation seems unnecessary. Why? Because what’s currently there does the job and it works! When it no longer works for whatever reason, that’s the time to revisit the thing and get with a new programme.

(b) Food may become non-compliant with the legal requirements of the country to which it is being exported. Exporters, who currently comply with the market that they are exporting to will have to comply with the Bill even if this makes them non-compliant with their export market. One word, GOBBLEDEGOOK! Two actually, add RIDICULOUS!

(c) The cost of exemptions is looking like a Government money-spinner since introducing large fines will apply even in cases of technical breaches of inexact and, at times, complex and contradictory laws. I get the idea of modernising New Zealand Food Laws to ensure their overall efficient and consistent application but the Bill as it’s currently written has seriously lost itself in translation; and finally

(d) The conditions being imposed by the Bill are inconsistent with other proposed legislation. There’s nothing wrong with the current set of conditions under the Food Act so why throw up road-blocks to our food exporters by making them spend more time, money and effort trying to comply with a half-baked Bill that’s pure and simple, in it’s present form, GOBBLEDEGOOK.

Failing Forward as a Progressive Option

In a roundabout way then, perhaps Lennon’s ‘The National Health Cow’ from “A Spaniard in the Works” might tickle your fancy ~

I strolled into a farmyard l When no-one was about l Treading past the troubles
I raised my head to shout l “Come out the Cow with glasses” l I called and rolled my eye l It ambled up toward me l I milked it with a sigh

‘You’re just in time’ the cow said l Its eyes were all aglaze l ‘I’m feeling like an elephant l I aren’t been milked for days’ l ‘Why is this? ‘ I asked it l Tugging at its throttles l ‘I don’t know why, perhaps it’s ’cause l My milk comes out in bottles’ l ‘That’s handy for the Government’ l I thought, and in a tick l The cow fell dead all sudden l (I’d smashed it with a brick).

Ordinary Us

But, if you like me, don’t understand The Food Bill: 160-2 (2010) gobbledegook — then let’s hope our voices are heard through continued public submission & petition and the Government reconsiders its lack of common sense leadership in allowing this Bill to be passed.

Listening to us all (industry and non-industry voices alike), now that would be failing forward fruitfully. But if they need a brick up the side of the head, contact your local MP and voice your concerns and/or opposition to the Bill. Put them to work, that’s why they’re there.

© Gail Penney 2011  PREVIOUS BLOG POST: The Merchants of Menace